2) Have a lie down
4) Drink unholy amounts of tea
5) Complain to anyone who’ll listen
Just checking in.
I’m on the home stretch with two essay which are in next week so my life has been pretty boring. I can’t get over how quickly the time has gone, how is it nearly Christmas?!
I hate that all this work has got in the way of blogging. It’s not even just that I’ve been too busy. I guess it’s mainly that after spending all my time reading and writing for uni I don’t really feel like doing more of it when I could be sleeping/watching TV etc.
The other annoying thing about having all this work to do? It makes me eat about 10 meals a day simply because that’s an excuse to have a break.
Anyways, I’m finally taking my work seriously. First year didn’t count for me so I never had to do much work. I always did fine and besides it was first year – you were supposed to be having fun. Then second year started and I was having a bit of a rough time and spent most of term time going out and drinking too much. I did the minimum amount of work necessary to get through and that was reflected in my distinctly average grades. Last year was America and once again I had not a care in the world.
And now here I am and I haven’t felt good about anything I’ve done academically in years. Not since I somehow aced my A levels, which, given the lack of anything else to back them up, I’m beginning to think might have been a fluke.
Suffice to say I’m beginning to feel the pressure, hence all the work I’ve been doing.
I just keep thinking that my excuse about not having done any work in second year is really a big lie, maybe I didn’t do very well in second year because I’m not good enough. Then I think maybe if my A levels were a fluke then I shouldn’t have even got in to a university like Nottingham in the first place. Then I think that maybe however much work I do I’m never going to do as well as I want to. Then I think that I’m going to let myself/everyone else down. Then I think I’m never going to get a good job. Then I have to have a lie down because I’m getting all freaked out.
So yeah, safe to say final year’s already driving me a little insane. Looking forward to round two when I have this PLUS a twelve thousand word dissertation to write…WAHOO!
That’s all for now
P.s Yeah, you know that thing I said about complaining? Well it’s the internet world’s turn to listen to my whining, I applaud you if you made it this far.
P.p.s I feel like I should mention that despite being quite stressed, I’m actually finding my essays quite interesting, maybe I’ll write about that once they’re both finished!