My Future...

A manifesto for life…

As I stand here, on the brink of my ‘adult life’,  it comes to mind that I should make some kind of promises…pledge to be a good kind of person, the kind you’d want to know.

I’ll start with the big stuff…

I promise to try and be the kind of person who can let go of the past. I tend to hang on to grudges and regrets and disappointments. But I’ll try and stop because I want a mind that’s open to new opportunities, not preoccupied by the past.

I promise to be kinder to myself, physically and emotionally. To eat healthily(ish) and make time to move a bit more, make some good habits. And to stop beating myself up. To try and ‘learn to love myself’ like everyone’s always saying you should do.

I promise to be kind to you. Whoever you are. If you’re just stopping by I hope that you get some good vibes and if you know me then please expect it from me and call me out if it doesn’t happen.

I promise not to give up. Whatever challenges I’ll have to face, whether or not I feel strong enough to persevere, I’ll try to do it anyway. The seemingly simplest of things, getting a job, is already proving a challenge and the rejections are really no fun but I’ll keep trying.

I promise to be excited about the future more than I’m scared of it. To always try and find things to look forward to and embrace the unknown. And not to feel too sad about getting older.

I promise to go back to my natural hair colour at least once in my life.

I promise to always use my right to vote and make the effort to make an informed decision.

I promise to save money sensibly most of the time and spend recklessly a little bit of the time.

I promise to always remember how gross smoking is and to never start.

I promise to get everyone dancing to Take That at my wedding.

I promise not to take people for granted. To always be polite and to make people feel valued.

I promise to limit the amount of days I spend in pyjamas doing nothing productive. But I promise I’ll do it occasionally.

I promise that I will never, ever send anyone invites to any Facebook game…ever.

I promise to try and have as much fun as possible even when I’m doing things that don’t immediately scream ‘fun’ at you.

I promise to name my future cats after Jim and Pam from The Office.

I promise to stop being so addicted to Facebook and to stop using it to compare my life to other people’s. And to never be someone who cares so much about it that I feel the need to complain when the layout changes.

I promise to take more photos so I don’t forget anything.

I promise to never care even a little bit about what the Kardashians or anyone from TOWIE/MIC are up to.

I promise to travel.

I promise to back up my computer regularly.

I promise to become a grandmother with stories worth telling.

I promise to always bring cake.

That’s all for now


Written for the Daily Post Weekly Writing Challenge.

My Future...

Why 30 has to be the new 20 for some of us…

Yesterday I listened to a TED talk by clinical psychologist Meg Jay about “Why 30 is not the new 20”.

Jay wants us to embrace our twenties because they will define our futures. However, I can’t help feeling that this pressure in today’s job market is a little unfair.

My boyfriend has just graduated and I have watched him struggle to find a job over the past few months, sending out hundreds of applications.

And what did he have to show for all this hard work? Two job offers.

He didn’t get a single other response.

Two job offers…that’s pretty good you might think. So where were these jobs then? One was for a part time position stacking shelves at a supermarket chain. The other was for a 3 month unpaid internship at a PR company.

In the end he decided to take the hit of being unpaid and get the experience of working at the PR company. Luckily he’s enjoying it but it finishes in November…then what?

I find it incredibly frustrating that this is the position that bright, hard working graduates from good universities with good degrees are being forced into. Choosing between working in a supermarket where they will gain no valuable experience or working for nothing.

And not only that, but we’re supposed to be grateful that we’re working for nothing, that we’re being given this great opportunity to be exploited.

Maybe I sound a little extreme here but this is by no means an isolated case. I’ve heard plenty of horror stories about people having to work far beyond what is reasonable for an intern and yet still going home with nothing at the end of the day but the vague hope that it’ll lead to something better.

And my boyfriend is one of the lucky ones. He is lucky to live close enough to London that he can get an internship in the city and still live at home with his parents. He is lucky that he has managed to get an internship position that he is interested in and where he is able to make connections which might help him in the future. And he is lucky that he even has the luxury to make the decision between a paid and unpaid job, for many graduates the option of working for nothing is out of the question.

So what does this have to do with the TED talk I started off talking about? Jay claims that our twenties are actually “the defining decade of adulthood” which I have nothing against in principle. What I do have a problem with is that there are thousands of twentysomethings who are unable to use their twenties to define their lives in terms of a career because they are unable to find or to afford to have the career they want.

I have nothing against working hard but the fact that we have no choice but to do it for nothing seems horribly unfair. If I had it my way companies wouldn’t be allowed to have people working for them when they’re not paying them minimum wage or at least giving them the guarantee of a job at the end of it.

I don’t know what will happen when I graduate, maybe I’ll be one of the lucky ones. But, to be honest, the future looks kind of bleak.

Here’s the TED talk if you’d like to watch. I like what Jay is saying. I’m just feeling a little disenchanted at the moment.

That’s all for now


My Future...

My top five things I want to be when I grow up…

Written in response to Daily Prompt: Ballerina Fireman Astronaut Movie Star

When I was 10 and someone asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up my answer, without pause, would be ‘An actress and dancer’. I didn’t have a shadow of a doubt in my 10 year old mind that that was what and who I was going to be.

Now I’m 22 and the question’s still being asked. The wording’s changed slightly, it’s ‘what are you going to do when you graduate?’ or (more irritatingly) ‘so what are you going to do with that degree?’ but it’s still the same question, people are still desperate to know what I’m going to do when I grow up. Now when someone asks me I simply shrug and say ‘haven’t got that far yet’.

I was a busy 10 year old and I took part in plenty of dance and drama classes, who knows if I could have tried to make a career out of it (although I’m inclined to say no, I have a strong feeling I was devoid of any obvious talent). Still, my life took a different direction and now I’m studying for an American Studies degree and waiting for a flash of inspiration which will tell me what my new dream is.

With a lack of a clear career goal here’s five other things I hope to be when I’m a ‘grown up’:

1) Happy – Whatever I end up doing

2) Living somewhere other than Birmingham – Fingers crossed for London

3) Still in touch with the great friends I have now

4) Financially secure – not rich, just comfortable

5) Well educated and still learning

That’s all for now


P.s. If you want to read some of the other responses to this Daily Prompt, here they are.

  1. Daily Prompt: Dreams | Books, Music and Movies : my best friends
  2. Do Dreams Die? | DG Toons
  3. Daily Prompt: Dancing at Disney | Under the Monkey Tree
  4. “Do Dreams Die” On DG Toons! | Eyes Through The Glass – A Blog About Asperger’s
  5. Follow the Script | Daily Prompt: Ballerina Fireman Astronaut Movie Star | likereadingontrains
  6. Daily Prompt: Ballerina Fireman Astronaut Movie Star – show us DREAMS. | masadiso79’s Blog
  7. Caught in the Act | Godrick Gnomish
  8. From Pilot to Skypilot… | The Rider
  9. Daily Prompt: Ballerina Fireman Astronaut Movie Star | Beefy’s House o’ Fun
  10. Daily Prompt–Origin Story-Wrapping up year one with the Brainiacs | Jaye’s Brain
  11. Daily Prompt| Ballerina Fireman Astronaut Movie Star | Nurse Chymeera? | thechymeeradiaries
  12. Lyrical Dreamer [Daily Prompt: Ballerina Fireman Astronaut Movie Star] | unknowinglee
  13. Daily Prompt: Dreams | alienorajt
  14. Shelved Popstar Dreams | Maggie’s Stories
  15. Life Is What Happens When You’re Making Other Plans | Living Young & Wild & Free
  16. Yesterday… and today | Neva Samaki
  17. The Scientist | das Nicht-zuhause-sein
  18. Daily Prompt: If only I could sing | jennifermarshcurtis
  19. Variations on a Familiar Song | clarior e tenebris
  20. Field of Dreams | The Jittery Goat
  21. Daily Prompt: Dreams | Motherhood and Beyond
  22. When I was 10… | sat n’ all that
  23. Dreams and the Continual Creation of our Reality | The Seeker’s Dungeon
  24. daily prompt: all grows’d up | r | one studio architecture
  25. When I grow up I wanna be… | MC’s Whispers
  26. Weekly Phoneography: Flowers in the sky | weliveinaflat
  27. Daily Prompt: Ballerina, Fireman, Movie Star | Valley Girl Gone Country
  28. Unplugged | Quest for Whirled Peas
  29. ballerina, fireman, astronaut, movie star | unquiet fabrications and offerings
  30. Daily Promt: When I Grow Up! | The Story of a Guy
  31. Daily Prompt: Dreams | A Taste of Morning
  32. Daily Prompt: Ballerina Fireman Astronaut Movie Star | Chronicles of an Anglo Swiss
  33. Ballerina Fireman Astronaut Movie Star: Dreams | Khana’s Web
  34. From Explorer to Photographer | Nikoleta Stamataki
  35. Dreams Do Come True | Andante Cantabile
  36. Daily Prompt: Dreams and Maple Trees | A Good One
  37. When I grew up… | tornin2’s Blog
  38. Dream Come True! | Haiku By Ku
  39. Daily Prompt:”to sleep perchance to DREAM.” | Slam on the Brakes, Pull Over, Take the Picture
  40. Young Dreams | Sincerely, Ms. Roberts
  41. Daily Prompt: The Brilliance of Being Ten | One Starving Activist
  42. 10 | Hope* the happy hugger
  43. Daily Prompt: “A Professional Chess Player at Age 10″ | Creative Mysteries
  44. Preoccupational Calling | clarior e tenebris
  45. Three Things Serial: 2 Ballerina, Fireman, Astronaut | Teagan’s Books
  46. Daily Prompt: Ballerina Fireman Astronaut Movie Star | Basically Beyond Basic
  47. Dreams of the Young: WordPress Daily Prompt | Write on J.B.
  48. When I grow up, I want to be… | Random Encounters of an Inquisitive Mind
  49. Who Would Have Known | Summer Reminisce
  50. From pirate or marine biologist to journalist | Life is great
  51. Daily Prompt: Ballerina Fireman Astronaut Movie Star | reyoflight
  52. Daily Post| You Then vs You Now | The Mind of Profex
  53. Satellites and Dreams | I Didn’t Just Wake Up This Morning with a Craving
  54. A Passion That No Longer ‘Draws’ My Attention | Molly Greye
  55. Daily Prompt: Of Cheeseburgers and Science | cinnwriterblog
  56. Daily Prompt: Ballerina Fireman Astronaut Movie Star | “The Ish,” presented by the Bohemian Rock Star
Films I've Seen..., My Future...

My top five ways I’ll know I’ve ‘made it’…

I have a habit of setting unrealistic goals for myself. As a result of being a fairly optimistic person I genuinely believe that at some point in my life I am going to be really rich and have the job of my dreams and live in a big house with loads of antiques and throw dinner parties every weekend. It’s not that I can’t imagine the prospect of everything going wrong and ending up poor and unhappy but even then I’ll probably assume it’s only temporary.

I’ve long entertained these ideas of what my life will be like when I’ve ‘made it’ in the real world and become a proper grown up and there’s certain things I must own or be before I can declare myself satisfied.

I must have one of these

1) I must have ‘One of those cool old phones like off of Three Men and  a Baby’

If you’ve never seen Three Men and a Baby I must first ask what on earth you’re doing with your life and demand that you find some way of watching it immediately…it has Tom Selleck, Ted Danson and some other guy taking care of a baby, that’s all you need to know (and I’m talking Tom Selleck and Ted Danson before they both got old and fat, don’t google what they look like now because it’ll just depress you).

Anyway, in said film they are not only taking care of a baby, they are also living together in an amazing penthouse apartment which Tom Selleck’s character designed because he plays an architect. They have lots of cool stuff and the coolest of all this stuff is one of those old fashioned wall phones where you hold one thing to your ear and speak into the thing on the wall, totally impractical in today’s world of mobile devices. Anyway, I’ve kind of lost  where I was going with this because, in case you haven’t noticed, I really like talking about Three Men and a Baby…oh yes so this phone, this is what I’m going to own and that is the first thing I’m going to buy when I have extra money and a nice house.

Because this film was made in the 80s there is a severe lack of screen shots from it online so I couldn’t find one of them actually using the phone, instead you can just look at Tom Selleck et al with a small baby

2) I’ll shop only at Waitrose and buy all organic food

Pretty self explanatory really. I’ll have a kitchen with an island and lots of extremely expensive brightly coloured kitchenware and make nutritious and organic meals for my children and husband after a nice country walk…or something like that. As long as I have a kitchen with an island and the brightly coloured kitchenware it’s cool.

3) Own a grand piano

I cannot play the piano. Nor do I currently have any space whatsoever to put one. But that is not the point. One day when I’ve earnt so much money that I don’t even need to work anymore, and I spend most of my time doing volunteer work, I’ll host lavish dinner parties and play the grand piano (obviously I will have learnt by then) as the guests enter through my marble foyer.

4) Go on a game show because ‘I fancy a challenge’

You know those people who go on game shows just because they’re retired and have nothing better to do? Like when old rich people go on Come Dine With Me and host the dinner party in their mansions and make a point of saying that they ‘couldn’t care less about the money’, they just want to see if they could do it.

This actually seems kind of mean considering that, by this stage in life, that grand you might win from going on Come Dine With Me could actually CHANGE SOMEONES LIFE and yet you’re just going on there to keep yourself entertained. And when you do win, which you inevitably will since you can afford to spend hundreds on getting your guests excessively drunk on champagne so that they assume they must have had a good time even though they can barely remember it, you can just take that grand and add it to one of your many piles of money.

You know what, I’m not so sure about this…ok, I’ll go on a game show for the challenge but then give all my winnings to charity, much better.

5) Go on a spur of the moment holiday

When we were discussing this idea of having ‘made it’ at some point, one of my friends said that going on a spur of the moment holiday was the way she would know that she had made it in life. So now I’m stealing the idea for my blog because I’ve decided I want to do this one day too! So you’ll wake up on, say, a Tuesday morning and you’re feeling a little overworked, you turn to your boyfriend/girlfriend/husband/wife and say ‘I could really do with a holiday’ and they grab a laptop and book a minibreak to Italy for that weekend, all before you’ve even got up for work. I hope my boyfriend is reading this and taking note.

I’ll be there by Friday night…

That’s all for now